Blog Obama

Today I was bored, so I started browsing random blogs here on Blogger. Sometimes you have to check out the competition, and yes, writing blogs is, indeed, very competitive. I have to say, most of the blogs out there bored me to tears. Well, not tears, but bored me enough to mix another drink. Blogger has a “Blogs of Note” section, which is populated mostly by blogs authored by middle aged people reminiscing about the old days or how great the new president is gonna be.

Obama. Not gonna lie, I didn’t vote this election. I was out of the country and getting an absentee ballot proved to be more of a chore than I was willing to put in for. But, if I would have voted, I probably would have voted for Obama. The other guy, (what’s his name now?) McCain. He was pretty scary, he looks like Skeletor, He-Man’s infamous arch-nemesis. I don’t vote for anyone who so closely resembles a super-villain.

Anyway, Obama is like a fucking rock star now. I think people are really expecting him to actually use some sort of divine magic to solve all of America’s problems. People are forgetting that he's still a politician and it ain’t gonna happen that easy. I’d be ecstatic if he somehow got all of the troops out of Iraq in four years, which I deem wishful thinking. First thing he’s doing is closing Guantanamo Bay, which doesn’t make that much sense to me. Ok, so he’s closing a military prison where terrorist suspects were kept without trial, a place that will forever be connected with the mismanagement of the war by the Bush presidency. But this is completely symbolic. If the U.S. government closes their main military prison, of course they are going to open another one. So it won’t be Guantanamo Bay where terrorist suspects are made to pose for naked hooded photos, it’ll be some other place. What’s the difference? To me it seems like a waste of resources. The military is already there, they have a badass prison set up, why close it? So we can pay to build a new one somewhere else with a different name? They should just rename it, something like, “America’s Badass Terrorist Prison in Cuba,” or maybe, “America’s Sunshine Prison Where Prisoners are Happy!” Or something else along those lines, I dunno, I’m not a pro spin doctor.

Ok, I’ve grown bored of this topic. Today when I was waiting for the bus, this weird dude was talking to everyone at the bus stop, but no one was really listening. He was just talking, and he happened to mention how he wanted to start snowboarding, but he wanted his own custom snowboard with a graphic of a zombie cowboy and a zombie bull on it. I couldn’t help but start laughing at the idea. Just looking at this guy I could tell he was never going to learn to snowboard but I think he actually had put some thought into this idea. But after thinking about it a little bit, that would be a pretty badass snowboard design. Most snowboards and skis have pretty gay graphics on them anyways, why not a sweet zombie cowboy riding a zombie bull. I’d buy it.

Econo-Blog

Every time I turn on the TV or look on the internet now all I hear or read is how the economy is going to shit and we’d all better hold on to our butts. Not to downplay the economic crisis our country and the world is in right now, but I’m pretty sick of hearing about it. Okay so jobs are no longer plentiful and the American automobile industry is going belly-up; but are these things really worth worrying about? Most responsible hard working Americans, if there are any of those left, would say yes. I for one am starting to think that the economic crisis is being blown way out of proportion by the media. Every time you turn on CNN they have another pundit prophet of doom saying how the economy is going to get way worse before it gets better. I’m not sure if an economic expert had high hopes about the coming years if he would even get any airtime. For some reason people only want to hear or read about it if it is bad news. Anybody who wants to get on TV or be taken seriously has to predict the worst possible outcome.

Maybe some people are thinking, well if there was any good news they would report it. Doubtful. Good news doesn’t get good TV ratings. It’s stupid, but true. I really don’t even like watching the news anymore because it all seems like sensationalized bullshit. Even sports news, which I used to enjoy, has become mostly full of gossip and banter that has nothing to do with actually playing sports. The sports media is more concerned with how well the team gets along off the field than how they play on the field. Who cares if some guy is everyone’s friend? If he’s good at sports isn’t he doing his job?

Yahoo is the worst. For some reason I have Yahoo as my homepage, so first thing I read everyday is snippets on what the new best city to live in is and where all the recession proof jobs are. I hope people aren’t really falling in for all this crap and freaking out; but they probably are. I’m glad I live in the middle of nowhere away from all the “normal” people. I can easily ignore things. Sure the economy here isn’t as good as it used to be, but I got a job. It ain’t that bad…yet.

If it gets any worse I know where I’m investing my money. Guns and ammo. If we’re all gonna be living on the streets you better be strapped and ready to handle yo’ biznaz! Actually I figure I’d hightail it back to Michigan and join my family in a compound in the woods upstate. We’d be armed to the teeth and no one would screw with us. Especially the government. What’s that? The Michigan Militia already does that stuff? Crap. Hmmm…well I guess they’ve been right all these years. Those crazy rednecks were on to something.